A Warning...From My Balls.

Dont Make Me Have To Smack That Ass. Nah, Just Kidding...I'd Smack It Anyways.

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Gobble, Gobble, Balls.

I Think A Petition Should Be Started To Change November To YESvember.

I Don't Need To Be Told I'm "IN". I Invented "IN". I'll Let you Know When you're "IN".

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Who's Claiming These Balls!!!

I Always Cheat On My Girlfriends. That's Because I Never Actually Meet The people Going Around Calling Themselves My Girlfriend. Which Makes It Difficult For Me To Know My Girlfriend. Which Makes It Even More Difficult For Me Not To Cheat On Them. Yeah.

Givin' The Girls The Only "O's" they Need. The O-NE. The O-NLY. The O-RIGINAL. THE CP. BITCHES.


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Deeez Nuuuuutz Ain't My Baaaaallllz.

The CP.

Creepin' While Ya Sleepin',

Shootin' While Ya Poppin',

Workin' While Ya Jerkin'.

Quality, Not Quantity. (Huh, Huh, I Said "Tity".)


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There's No "I" In Team. But My Balls Work Together.

you Can't  (you Can't. I Can) Predict For Certain What The Future Will Bring. you Can Only Know For Certain That My P-Ness Will Dominate It.  #TEAMPNESS.


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Workin' Hard Or Hardly Workin'...On My Balls.

Some People Wonder: "Why Does The CP Spend So Much Time In The Ocean...Is He Part Fish?"

No. I Am Not Part Fish.

I Spend So Much Time In The Ocean Because I Long For The One Final Time When Osama Stick His Toung Out And Carressingly, And Oh So Gently, Licks The Bottom Of My Ball Bag One Final Time.

This Has Been Another Moment....With My Balls.

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you'd Have To Have Balls, FIRST.

The Next Time you Walk Into A Skyscraper And Osama Bin Laden Doesn't Fly A Plane Into It And you Don't Die In A Firery, Melting, Mess, Yeah,  you're Welcome.


But, The Next Time you're Walking Down The Street And An Idiot, Who Failed At Sports And Professional Wrestling And Life As A Whole, Stops you On The Side Of The Road For An Hour And Puts his Hand On his Gun To Look Tough (Or Maintain his Balance), I'm Sure he'll Tell you That What He Does Is Just As Important...And In his Mind, Actually Believe It.


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The Biggest Balls Of Them All...

It Has Often Been Said: "Sh*t Or Get Off The Pot." Well, In Case you Haven't Noticed, I Have Been On The Throne, And I Have Been Sh*tting, And If you Couldn't Tell, It's Either Because My Sh*t Don't Stink Or you're Just Stupid.


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Who's Balls.....DEEEEEEZ BALLS!!!!

Teenage Girls Are Supposed To Go Nuts Over Me. I'm A Huge F*cking Star. The Only Time Teenage Girls Go Nuts Over your cops, lawyers, judges, or politicians Is When you're Trying To Molest Them.

If you Want Fans To Cheer, Call The Beatles. If you Want Fans To Riot, Call Me.

In Other Words, The Sound Of A Fagget Is Whoop, Whoop. Not Beep, Beep.

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Work Is Wack..But My Balls Are Forever.

Let's Get One Thing Straight: I Am Worth Way Too Much Money For A Job. Jobs Are Cheap. Jobs Are For Regular People. Let's Get That Straight Right Now. Work Is Wack. You Know Who Needs Jobs? your cops, your lawyers, your judges, your politicians, your doctors, your buh-d's, the "state", Need Jobs. they Need To Work. That Way, they Can Afford To Buy Tickets To See Me Instead Of Having To Make Up False Stuff And Write It On Paper To See Me Instead. you Get A Job. you Work. I'm Not Changing For Anybody.


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Gotta Let 'Em Know...My Balls Are Working...Hard.

When your cops, lawyers, judges, politicians, and doctors, you Know, The Real Criminals, Are Rotting Away To Death In Prison, you Will Know That I Have Done My Job. you Will Know That I Work And you Will Know What My Job Is.

To Find Out More About What 's Putting them In Prison...Read More...

(Seriously, This Is Great Stuff...And It's All True. Not Like That "oceans" Bullsh*t.)

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