My Balls Are Crunchier And Have Better Texture. Ask My Date.

Cereal Has Really Gone Down Hill. Instead Of Wasting Our Time On Wars, Disease, Poverty, And Weather Disasters, Let's All Take A Moment To Focus On A Severely Neglected Problem In Our Society...The Grossly Neglected Quality Of Our Cereals.

There Are Few Things Worse Than Opening Up A Fresh Box Of Cereal, That you Remember Enjoying As A Kid (Or Still Are A Kid And Are Attempting To Enjoy your Cereal, But Then Become Disenfranchised And Have To Write About It In your Blog.), Grabbing The Milk you Chilled At Just The Right Temperature, Pouring your Cereal Into The Bowl, Dowsing It In Just Enough Of That Cow Juice, Digging In With your Spoon, Bringing It Up To your Grill, Chomping Down On What you Believe To Be That Same Succulent Treat you Remember From Years Gone By, And Having That Cereal Melt Away Like The Winter Snow Or Dissolve Into A Puff Of Dust In your Mouth.

you Gotta Be F*cking Kidding Me. Cereal Too?

How Can We Expect To Improve The Quality Of Our Country, When We Can't Even Improve The Quality Of Our Cereal. Just As Society Has Gone Down Hill So Has Our Cereal. Only When We Can Improve The Quality Of Our Cereal, Can We Have Any Hope Of Improving Ourselves (Well, yourselves) As People.

This Economy Sucks.